Almost time to travel…..

prizesSo we are getting down to the wire for travel and raising money for China!! We rec’d a $5000.00 matching grant… So thankful but that means we have to match it!! So, here we go… We are doing another give-a-way… A little different than last time. There are 6 prizes to win.

First prize: $2,500.00 diamond necklace purchased from Zales! (Donated by a very sweet and dear friend of mine)

Second prize: An android smart watch!!

Third prize: An android smart watch!!

Fourth prize: $50 gift certificate to RedThreadStitches Boutique on Etsy

Fifth Prize: A 30 oz Yeti Rambler

Sixth Prize: A 30 oz Yeti Rambler

How to enter to give-a-way:

1 chance = $ 10.00
3 chances = $ 20.00
5 chances = $ 30.00

To enter send PayPal to: LngRedRose@aol.com

Please click on send money to family and friends so we are not charged a fee!!

Drawing will be held as soon as we reach the amount needed for the matching grant!!!

Thanks for loving us and helping us bring our 3 girls home!!! We leave on August 11th…. So we are really down to the wire!!!

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Update!!!!

Sooooo we travel in approximate 20 days!!!! Eccckkkk we are going to get out girls!! Our only obstacle… Funding. Praying that we are funded soon. Please join us in prayer for this! Love you all…. ❤️

Adoptions, disruptions and everything in between…

Sometimes, yes, oft times, adoption is not fun, rainbows, unicorns, giggles and laughter.  Sometimes, it is hard.  Really hard. 

I know we all like to hear of the good times, the warm fuzzy blogs, the ones where you go to adopt and everyone lives happily ever after.  Wow.  How amazing and nice that would be.  But that is not the real world… nor the real expectations of adoption.

Our children are our world… our very heartbeat.  They are amazing, resilient, and strong… for the most part.  But then there are days that they are broken, hurt, confused, teary and just full of emotions that normally are not good ones.  I have heard the saying, adopt them “as young as possible” so you can avoid the trauma, the memories, the baggage.  Trust me when I say, “trauma, night terrors, pain, hurt, heartbreak” is no respect of person.  It can happen to a child that is adopted straight from the hospital as well as the child that is adopted at age 13 and aging out of the system.  There are no guarantees in adoption (as there are no guarantees in having a biological child).

So to put it bluntly… adoption is a leap of faith.  What I am going to say next is probably not very popular.  That is fine.  I am not about being popular… I am about being honest.

The kind of things in this arena that make me crazy are when families go to Ch*na to adopt and they leave the child there.  There have been crazy reasons… and I do mean CRAZY.  For instance.. one family left their “son” there because he didn’t have enough hair.  One family left their child there because she cried too much.  (You JUST took the child from everything and everyone they know… you better hope they cry).  One family left their child because she was so shell-shocked that she DIDN’T cry.   One family left their aging out daughter there because she was 13 and picked a toy/book that seemed much younger than her chronological age.  One family left their child there because she cried to go swimming.  Wow.  Insane.  All I can do is shake my head and ask… what in the world were they thinking.  I wonder… were they truly prepared for adoption… did they talk to others, did they read, did their agency tell them to subtract so many months off their age for each year they lived in an orphanage, or did they just go to adopt expecting a smart, perfect child that, God forbid, should have known English from day one.  Oh yeah.. there is a family that thought that too… how could I have left them off!??!

So let me tell you how I see it.  Imagine that YOU are that child that is being adopted.  Some white faced person that speaks a crazy language is there to take you home.  I can only imagine that the child is thinking… Are you insane?  You want me to go with these people that I have never met?  You want me to be happy instantly?  You want me to just laugh, jump for joy and then be the perfect little angel? You want me to enjoy the fact that they look, smell, talk and eat differently that we do?  You want me to instantly understand English?  Are you insane?  Yes, I can imagine that our newly adopted children think that and so much more.

I look at my biological children.  If something would have happened to me when they were younger and they were put up for adoption and a foreign couple walked in and said, I am here to take you home.. how would MY biological child have reacted?  It would NOT have been pretty.  Let me promise you.  They would have screamed, kicked, hit, spit, scratched and everything else.  They would have retreated into a shell of who and what they really were.  How in the world can we expect differently from a child that we go and uproot from everything and everyone they have known?

And then we get them home.  We think life is grand and that all is well.  The child is settling in nicely and bonding appropriately.  Wow.  Awesome.  Great.  Then one day… one little thing triggers something that sets them off.  They don’t even know why.  They just know the only way to deal with it is to act out.  At that moment, OUR true character comes out.  The way we deal with that trauma, hurt and pent up angry or disappointment is an indication of how prepared we really are.  At that moment, we can choose to take it personally and react negatively or we can be nurturing.  Now, am I always perfect and do I always react in the correct manner?  No, a thousand times, NO!  But I am learning to listen to an inner voice saying… slow down… back down… something else is going on.  There is a bigger picture than what the naked eye can see.

So, to put an end to my rambling for the day… I am going to finish by saying this…

We all adopt for different reasons.  For me, it was that I could no longer have children and I had always wanted to adopt.  The reason I went to Ch*na is because I prayed and I felt my children were there.  For each of us, I am sure the reason is different than the next persons.  But, if we could all remember that these are children.  They are human beings.  They are not exchangeable for a different, better or younger model.  They are real human lives that we are impacting… either positive or negative.

Karen

 

 

Our family is growing again…

So here we go….

Stepping out in complete and utter faith, we are headed back to China to adopt not 1, not 2 BUT THREE, yes… you read it right… THREE daughters from China.  We started this journey adopting only 2 daughters.  Both are 2 and both have severe special needs.  Both will require many surgeries when they come home to the US.

We have two children from China that turned 14 this year.  We look at them and how awesome they are.  We think about the .. what if we hadn’t… and it tears us up inside.  We prayed.  We seeked God’s face.  We prayed some more and we looked at several files of aging out girls.  BUT, they just were not our daughter.  Then, I thought about a 13 year old that my precious friend, Desiree, had advocated for… for such a very long time.  She prayed, cried, loved and prayed more for this child.  Her own special Ruthie Joy.

I emailed Desi and asked if “Ruthie Joy” was still available.  She said yes.  I told her that we were praying about adding an aging out child to our current adoption journey.  She was overjoyed.  She has jumped through many hurdles with us on this journey!!!  We prayed some more and really felt that “Ruthie” was OUR daughter.  Then came the hard part.  We talked to our Social Worker.  She said, yes… absolutely!  She was excited.  She said I will support you anyway that I can.  (We LOVE our SW). Then we contacted our adoption agency.  Right off the bat I knew… they were not on board.  They were not in our corner.  They were not going to cheer us on.  I was crushed.  I prayed my guts out.  I begged.  I cried.  I pleaded.  I knew that they had allowed “three at the same time” with other families and I just knew that they would believe in us and support us in this decision.  They did not.  They were not on board.  I still tear up when I talk about it.  My heart is still raw from their decision.

By this time, several other agencies were hearing about our dilemma and they reached out to us.  They told us that they would gladly go to bat for our family.  They believed in us.  Wow.  They believed in US.  I prayed and prayed some more.  Then, I reached out to a couple that I greatly admire and think so highly of in the adoption arena.  They have facilitated hundreds of adoptions.  They have been around the adoption block more times than a few.  I have complete and utter faith in them both.  I emailed Cheryl with HIC and they never one time said, no… or that can’t be done… or we don’t want to ask… or anything negative.  They said, YES!  Let’s do this!!!  I sobbed.  I said, do you think China will approve us?  Cheryl said, yes.. I have no reason to see why they wouldn’t.  :::::wow:::::

Three days later we had PA!!!!  We had to switch agencies.  It was a complete leap of faith.  We lost grants totaling $15,500.00 that we had with our old agency.  Then we were billed for $3,300.00 just to transfer the files.  The adoption community rallied around us.  They donated $3800.00 which covered all of the fees from “Go Fund Me”.  We sent the $3300.00 and our daughter’s files were released!!!

So we have started again from ground zero.  Our homestudy agency jumped through hoops to update our homestudy and get it to our new agency.  They were amazing!!  (I highly recommend them).  The only thing that was standing between us and USCIS was $2500.00.  We didn’t know how we would get that money in a short period of time.  BUT, God knew.  He provided!!!  We will send that off this week and ask for it to be expedited since Aria (Ruthie Joy has a NEW name) will age out in August.

I have said all of that to say this… IF you feel in your heart that God is leading you to adoption… and that HE is in the center of it all… please do not let money stand in your way of doing what you feel is right in your heart.  When an agency says, NO… Keep asking… keep praying… find one that will say YES!  God WILL provide.  I know.. I know.. we have a TON of money to raise before August.  And I do mean a TON…. BUT, We have a truckload of faith.  We have seen our God move mountains!  Big, huge mountains!!  He can, He will and He wants to!!!

This was supposed to be an introduction of our family back to the blog world.  My next post will be about our family.  This post has been on my heart and I wanted to share our testimony with you all.

Please know that when you love, support, cheer, encourage and contribute to an adopting family… you are literally giving “LIFE”.   So reach out to someone adopting today.  Encourage them!  Cheer them on!  Support them!  Contribute to their adoption.  GIVE LIFE!!

Blessings….